Written by on June 12, 2018

A South African man, over the weekend, became an icon for men on the internet, for walking out on a R37,340 bill. That’s KES 287,358.19. The video circulating on both Twitter and Instagram shows about 5 girls having a ball in a bar, with drinks by the bottle littering their table. The story is the guy who took the video disappeared without clearing the bill. And from that, stories of men across the continent being left with exorbitant bills accumulated by girls (slay queens, if you prefer) at the bar have flushed the Internet. And my oh my, do we have manipulative tendencies as women, from the testimonies I have read! It’s actually a habit for girls to go to the bar, order drinks they personally can’t afford and expect a man they ask to join them (without mentioning the bill) to clear their preexisting bill!

Here’s one scenario; a guy invites a girl out for either food or drinks, and she shows up with her entire squad. He invited one person, budgeted for two people, and he’s suddenly paying for six to seven people. I understand girls might feel the need to be safe especially when meeting someone for the first time but it is only courteous to mention that you won’t be coming alone, and confirm if it’s okay. In another scenario, girls decide to go out, order for items they are well aware they are unable to pay for on their own, call up a guy or two and shove the bill at them. If the guy pays, I suppose that’s well and good. If he refuses to pay, he’s verbally abused (remember it was never in his budget to begin with) and called out for being less of a man, because he didn’t pay for a bill that wasn’t his. This is similar to what happens to women who refuse to put out when a guy expects sexual favors from them.

Female emancipation and equality come at a cost but this is not one of the costs. You can’t honestly expect a man to take care of a bill he didn’t accumulate (unless you have a pre-existing understanding with him) neither can you keep leeching off men in this way and expect to treated like a queen. No, honey, queens are responsible. Queens are courteous. Queens have their own. And queens don’t need men to bail them out of their own messes; queens handle their business! Unless a man has categorically asked you to bring your friends, don’t show up to a date squad deep, order for items you can’t afford and stare into the ceiling when the bill comes and you don’t even have an eighth of that on your person. No, come on ladies! Get in formation and get your paper! Take care of your bills and be responsible!

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